I’ve just joined Alex Cavanaugh’s Insecure Writers Support Group (the link takes you to details on what that means and how to join. You’ll also find a list of bloggers signed up to the challenge – do check them out). On the first Wednesday of every month, we all post our thoughts, fears or words of encouragement for fellow writers.
NaNoWriMo – or any other variation thereof. I’ve not done it this year. In actual fact, I’ve never done it. Every year, there’s aways a good reason not to, but that seemed a tad convenient, so I decided to take a good look to identify why that was.
The easy answer is that it’s a busy time of year. And I could stop there. In fact I recently commented on a blog post that I think it would be better doing it in January or February – January ‘cos most of us are poor from our excess seasonal spend and could really do with staying in, and February ‘cos it’s a bit blah weather-wise.
I allowed that idea to percolate away for a while on the basis that there was no reason I couldn’t set myself a challenge to write like mad for a month – just a better one than November – and that’s probably when I started to come up with the real reasons why I’ve not participated in NaNoWriMo yet.
- I’m a people pleaser, so I spend a lot of my time in doing stuff for the people I love which has absolutely zero benefit to me, or in spending time with the people I love doing stuff that they’re interested in. I struggle with erecting (let alone protecting) boundaries around time and space to focus on what matters to me.
- I’m afraid of failing, but the particular twist in this one is that on those rare occasions I’ve made a song ‘n dance around something being all about me, it’s blown up spectacularly in my face … each and every time. So the real reason may be that I’m avoiding trying as I’m afraid that karma might be telling me something.
- I’m scared I might find out I can’t write well enough – just that, no explanation required. Oddly, if I’m being honest – of the three, this one is holding me back the least.
Writing this has been surprisingly useful. Nothing like a bit of clarity and a problem (or two) to fix, rather than excuses …
PS: I know the group wrote about this last month, but I joined too late, and this is what’s been on my mind – a lot. So, if you’re still with me … thank you!
© Debra Carey, 2017