I’ve been doing a lot of writing recently, and while I enjoy writing tremendously, it came as a surprise to discover I have a limit on how much I can do. While I’ve never questioned the obvious limitations of time and the need to meet other commitments, I hadn’t considered the brain strain that can happen. The subject matter I’ve been producing has been heavy and serious, and I’d thought my brain would seize upon lighter topics, the like of which I prefer to write for here, go “hurrah!” and throw itself into some frivolity, silliness, or random nonsense…. but no, apparently not.
So a week got skipped, without any intent or aforethought. In the past, I’d have rushed around frantically, desperately trying to throw something together to meet my commitment (to myself as much anyone else) to post weekly, unless I announce a break. But when the well is dry, scratching about only throws up dust, so I relaxed and set to the reading of (and commenting upon) blog posts, which I decided offered the twin benefits of giving me enjoyment, while demonstrating there was nothing concerning about my unexpected absence.
I said to someone recently that while I know I have lots of stuff I want to do and am actively examining how to fit it all in, I don’t believe I want to flog myself in the process of getting it all done. I wonder if I’d miss the joy of frittering about if I was to spend every single minute purposefully achieving.
With the first quarter of the year behind us, this seems like a good time not just to make changes but to reflect on what those changes might be. With hindsight, my first quarter has been taken up with two eye operations. While the surgeries weren’t time consuming in themselves, I was surprised at the realisation that the advance prep and the recovery period afterwards totalled 10 weeks.
In the same quarter, I’ve been doing some deep inner work, and one significant bonus is the limitations of my post-op recovery periods gifted me considerable opportunity for reflection. While I am in the midst of trying various things out in order to maximise time, attention and energy, I’m also building in periods of mindful not achieving. And it appears that part of this attempt at a new balance is being relaxed about skipping a week in my blogging schedule 🙂
Do you plan how you balance your life between doing and resting, or are you just a natural?
© Debs Carey, 2024
debsdespatches.com 
I have to plan my rest because I live with someone who is always going. It’s hard to rest when she is home so I try to plan around her out of the house schedule.
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I’m a work in progress about pretty much everything
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Agreed Tater, I have to arrange times for rest because Himself relaxes and decompresses by watching stuff – TV or YouTube generally – whereas I rest with quiet and a book.
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What’s going on in your life currently must be putting so many demands on you LA so I’m not surprised that nothing can be set in stone for you. Take good care and I hope you’re able to fit in the rest that you need when you need it.
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“Mindful non-achievement!” What a great phrase. I’ve learned that if I don’t take a break, I get pretty short-tempered, which is not fair to child, spouse, dog, or cat. And its cumulative: those years managing house, pets, and non-napping kid while still trying to write took quite the toll. While I often feel guilty taking a lunch break and reading, I know I’d better.
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I am delighted you like it Autumn 🙂 I recognise that tired, short-tempered behaviour, which ended up leaving me feel riven with guilt and an unhappy child/boyfriend/family (my cat never cared!)
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I get where you’re coming from about feeling a commitment to yourself, then other people, about showing up to your blog. I try for a weekly post, but occasionally miss a week. It used to worry me, but now I take it in stride. I don’t know if it is because I’ve gotten better at not achieving [a wonderful term] or because I’ve come to realize people don’t actually miss me when I’m not around [said without rancor]. Either way you gotta do what works for you first and foremost.
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I understand this completely, Debs. Without announcing it, I took a very long blogging break. It was due probably to a malaise coupled with a deep bout of writer’s block. But I like your idea of staying engaged with reading and commenting — something I probably should have done myself because it can perhaps spur ideas. I’m sorry about your operations; I hope you’re doing better. – Marty
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Debs, recovering from eye surgery takes lots out of you. Not being able to see properly for awhile is physically straining and mentally stressful. Giving yourself breaks is called SMART!! 😊
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I’ve learned (especially last week!) how difficult it is to plan out doing vs. resting, so really, my approach these days is just to let whatever happens happen naturally.
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I do what I can, which isn’t nearly as much as it used to be, and I’ve always been kind of the slow but steady type.
Regarding blogging: I started before publishing my first novel, a novel about China during the Japanese invasion. My intent was to find some people who were interested in the topic and to provide some background stories. That was long ago. Now I just post when I think of something of interest. I don’t have a schedule or even a topic.
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Thank you Ally, I’m glad to see that term resonates with people. I doubt people would be concerned if I wasn’t to post, so it was the commitment to myself which was most on my mind. I was also genuinely surprised that my writing well ran dry in the way it did. Useful lesson though 🙂 Particularly as, since having eye surgery I can see dust, so I need time to do regular bouts of spring cleaning. The fridge is now sparkling 🙂 I have to pat myself on the back, because even if Himself notices, he’s not one for giving pats on the back for things that don’t matter to him! 😀
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Marty, they were only cataract removal ops, so nothing serious or particularly scary. But the disruption before and after was surprisingly – erm – disruptive (call myself a writer!) I do find reading blogs spurs idea. I don’t always use them immediately, but by getting back into writing something for the future, it can start the old writing cogs turning once more.
I’m sorry to hear about your malaise and writer’s block. Life, and the world, is a lot right now. It’s bound to take it’s toll. It is good to have you back though, and I hope you’re on the up.
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Thank you Jane 🙂 I suspect that seeing all the dust is going to make me more tired, as I work my way around the apartment giving things a (long overdue) spring clean! 🙂
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Mark, it’s a real swine when you get enjoying yourself time messed up. I like your approach and am tackling a number of new things atm, but using the principle of small bites. Yesterday, there were no bites taken, as I had other stuff going on, but today I was able to put aside a significant chunk of time. It means stuff won’t happen nearly as quickly as would be nice, but it will happen, and – most important of all – I won’t get overwhelmed and not do anything at all.
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Nicki, I’m learning the benefit of slow but steady, but that was never my natural way. But, I am now a cronky old lady and had to pace myself! 😉
My current blogging schedule over here generally works for me, but I’ve other places where I write/blog, and there’s no fixed schedule. Maybe one day I will apply more of a schedule to them, but maybe I won’t. I foolishly tried to do daily blogs for a while and quickly realised that it wasn’t a commitment I wanted to impose on myself! Even on social media, I can’t keep to anything like that type of schedule.
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Welcome back, Debs. Like you, I typically post once a week and used to be quite strict with myself about that, but more recently I’ve relaxed somewhat, and if anyone notices, they are kind enough not to question it…and yet they are there for me when I return.
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Christie, I need to channel that “not being strict with myself” attitude 🙂
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Unless you’re using the blog as part of a time-bound, structured career/business plan…. I’m all for going with your own flow, there are no rules, quality over quantity, and just…sometimes giving your time to other things – variety being the spice of life as they say! 😊 I think balance becomes easier when we get better at not feeling bad/guilty about the choices we make, or wondering what others will think (within reason😉) 💫
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