What do you wish you could do more every day?

I was talking to my Osteopath recently and she spoke of how she spent her days during the pandemic’s lockdown. She walked barefoot on the grass and swam in the sea every day, read stacks and stacks of books, ate when she felt hungry rather than according to a meal time schedule, was not governed by time in that she woke up when it felt natural rather than with an alarm clock. But the big one was she described being able to physically, emotionally and mentally rest, and to recover completely from feeling responsible for the well being of others.

And while I’m in no way keen on the idea of swimming in the sea off the coast of the UK (far too cold for someone brought up in the tropics), I’d happily exchange the swimming for walking beside the sea every day. And the rest sounded not too shabby either – especially the part about being able to rest fully.

I’ve long believed that if money were no object, I’d go back to University to study. And while that is still attractive, I am surprised how much I’m drawn to the idea of doing nothing other than the most simple bits of living. I suspect it’s a temporary response to feeling weary (rather than tired, if you see what I mean), but it also made me wonder if I’m moving more into the phase of my life when I’m less interested in doing and more in simply being.

Clearly the fact that I’m closer to my 70th birthday than to my 60th could be a factor, as could the fact that my life after Covid is different. Indeed, I suspect if I was to re-do my Myers Briggs test, I’ll have morphed from an extravert into a full blown introvert.

Would your response to the title of this blog be a long list? Do you have a bucket list, or is what I’m feeling something you share?

© Debs Carey, 2024

31 thoughts on “What do you wish you could do more every day?”

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  1. I’d like to be able to walk again in the woods. A dodgy hip is preventing that at present.

    I have all the time in the world to please myself.

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  3. Nice post. COVID and the closing of the most active phase of my retirement came along at the same time, so, as Lionel Hardcastle would say, doing very little, slowly, wasn’t hard for me to adapt to. I was ready! I’m one of the lucky ones whose bucket list was in pretty good shape.

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  4. Oh, to no longer have to take care of others! Every mom’s dream. Her list sounds pretty good, although I’d have added dancing to it if my knee weren’t a mess. And to live in New England and enjoy the seasons would also have been on my list.

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  5. 1gus1, I empathise with you on that front; I’m currently the same with dodgy knees.

    I am working on getting to a place where I do have as much time as I would like to please myself as a recovering people pleaser.

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  6. Totally get that Tater. I used to be one of those people too, but I’m leaning more and more into the resting and allowing the introvert in me to run things.

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  7. Thank you Jane. Good to know that the changes arrived when you were ready to welcome them in. I wasn’t at all sure I was, but I’m beginning to think I might just be. Oddly, I’ve never had a bucket list. Not sure what that says about me, hopefully that I’m largely content.

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  8. Yes, although in my case, it wasn’t my child who needed looking after, it was my mother. I could certainly welcome a magically better knee, and New England would also be something I’d welcome, whilst not actively yearning for it, if you see what I mean.

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  9. I’ve become more of an introvert since 2020 as well. Honestly, when you mentioned the pandemic lockdowns, I found myself romanticizing those days. There was nowhere to be, and I could spend entire days reading if I wanted to. It was actually kind of lovely, if I’m being honest. I never thought I’d feel that way—at the beginning, the idea of being stuck at home all the time felt terrifying. But now, I find myself longing for it.

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  10. I’ve never had a bucket list. When that concept first became popular, I felt it was a sign of how spoiled and rich we are. Maybe that came of my having spent so many years living in a developing country. It seems that we tend to think of the things in our buckets as being travel and fun daring experiences. On the other hand, everyone has hopes for what they will enjoy and/or accomplish in their life. We want to experience love, to contribute in some way to the world, and to enjoy the days of our life.

    The other day on X, I read a brief post by a young Ukrainian woman who said she’d always wanted to travel. She hoped she’d be able to after the war was over. I hope she will too.

    As for me, I’m eighty years old. I pretty much do as I please.

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  11. I’ve never had a bucket list, but I do want to do things, just don’t feel the need to keep track of them. As for what I wish I could do more of every day… it is read books. My eyes tire now after reading for very long, so I read fewer books than I once did. Which is ironic because I have more time now.

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  12. Yes, I have a similar feeling Kari. Looking back, except for being unable to see my daughter and her family, it felt like a simpler time.

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  13. Nicki, I’ve always been uncomfortable with the concept too. The things which I might put onto a bucket list are things I’d like to do, or opportunities I’d like to have, but I’m not going to pursue them relentlessly or move heaven and earth to achieve them.

    Also, as you say, age has changed things. I never thought it would, but it has.

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  14. Oh Ally, that is terribly sad. It would break my heart were that to happen. I’ve never had a bucket list either – it just never appealed.

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  15. I’d love to explore more. We do quite a bit of that already, but not nearly as much as I’d like as our garden is keeping us so busy. This sounds counterintuitive, but I’m actually looking forward to the cold and snow, so we can get out and do more fun things!

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  17. I completely get what you mean Mark, we had absolutely horrible downpours the week Himself & I had booked a week’s leave, but it meant we could go and mooch around some museums, which was brilliant.

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  19. My bucket list is pretty short, and not possible. I’ve always wanted to swim with the dolphins or manatees. Resting fully sounds nice. This process of moving on is not restful.

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  21. That sounds like a pretty good item to have on your bucket list. I’d have it on my list, except I’ve decided I will not make one.

    Resting fully does sound nice, but I acknowledge that knowing it is coming cannot be restful in any way at all. Sending ❤ from here to there.

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  22. I was initially disappointed we couldn’t get down to the seaside as that’s my happy place, but it turned out to be a most satisfactory Plan B – for which I owe thanks to Himself for doing all the research and planning.

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  23. As someone who is also approaching the 70 mark, I agree totally about being, not doing, Debs. I also am weary, as I’m waking up at 4.30am regularly. Writing is more effort these days.

    University may sound attractive, but is it really? I did an Open University degree in my 50s. It was boring, exhausting and having so much to do isolated me from friends and family.

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  24. It’s a bit self centred though, isn’t it? I can understand the desire for a break but, although I could afford to go back to university and I agree study would be interesting, I’d miss the social contact and the chance to do something meaningful in society that my job brings.. And I totally agree with you about cold water swimming (and I am a Brit)

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  26. Caroline, I certainly spent the majority of my life thinking I couldn’t (or shouldn’t) do something *just* for myself. Probably one of the reasons I’ve never even considered any form of bucket list (that and the being brought up in third world countries) as Nicki (@behindthestory) expressed. I didn’t get an opportunity to attend university when most people normally do, as good catholic girls didn’t do anything so self-indulgent when I was growing up. But I discovered how much I love learning in my 50s, hence why I’d love to continue to indulge that side of myself.

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  27. If you didn’t have the opportunity previously, then that’s a different story. But I’m astonished – for me and many others, university wasn’t self indulgent – it was only route to enter my chosen career

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  28. Caroline, in my (catholic boarding school), university as a path to a career was only for those going into law, medicine or the like, whereas I’d have wanted to study something like English which would’ve been regarded as entirely self-indulgent. I wasn’t academic material, although I don’t recall that being considered a career path by the nuns either. Really, we were only meant to be nurses (or physiotherapists) or secretaries, until we got married and had babies. Absolutely bonkers when you think about it now, but there you are.

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  29. Rosemary, I just found your comment which had fallen into spam – WP playing up again methinks.

    Waking up at 4.30am sounds exhausting. Are you up at that time to write, or is there some other reason behind it?

    I did the same, but I loved it so much. I understand how it might isolate a person, but I managed to squeeze in a splendidly busy social life at the same time. It may’ve been easier as I was single at the time, and my daughter was grown up and busily living her own life, so I could largely organise my time without recourse to other’s needs.

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  31. Yes, I agree with you there Earl. In my case, it’s my knees, but I love long walks. Fortunately the seaside is only 45 minutes drive from where we live inland, so I do get to stroll there from time-to-time as it does provide a huge uplift in mood for me.

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