So, we’re on the home stretch. I hope you’ve been answering these questions along with me – even if you don’t share the answers, after all not everyone’s comfortable with sharing their “stuff”. Surprisingly few of the questions have had no relevance or resonance which I always think is a good sign. Links to Parts 1, 2 & 3 appear at the foot of the post.
So ….
21. What’s the biggest waste of money you’ve ever seen?
My first thought was that films cost a vast sum of money and there’s some truly awful ones around but, as quite a number of them did well at the box office, it’s just they weren’t to my taste, so I’ll put thit thought aside.
Instead, let’s go with the UK decision to leave the EU. Whatever way you voted, you probably didn’t want it to cost more to leave than to remain. Nor did you want it to cost more for every year thereafter. And it’s going to. So I’d say the Referendum was the biggest waste of money I’ve ever seen, as the only people providing “information” were those peddling untruths of the “we can save £360m from EU membership and use it for the NHS” variety. Academics tried to disseminate actual hard facts, but the voting public want sound bites, and no politicians on the remain platform seemed to think (or realise) that they needed to make an effort to educate.
22. What common misconception do you hate to hear repeated as fact?
I can’t say I hate any, but I am amused by the urban legend which said that “Berliner” translates to jelly donut and that Berliners were amused by JFK’s words “Ich bin ein Berliner” when – in fact – the words are standard German for “I am a Berliner.”
23. Where is the best place to go to meet awesome people?
I guess it depends what’s your view of awesome is. If it happens to be hugely confident and sociable types, then your local rugby club could be a good place. But if you’re looking for something a bit more niche, it could be anywhere. These days, online is often a good place to start, particularly as “facilities” are often grouped by interest/status.
24. What food do you crave most?
Carbs – generally bread – hence my previously expressed desire to learn about baking sourdough! However, the only thing I’ve tried to give up and actually craved to the point of dreaming about it is … yoghurt (I gave up dairy after a breast cancer diagnosis). And I’d thought it would be cheese that got me!
25. What TV series do you keep coming back and watching?
There’s a couple – The West Wing and Band of Brothers – truly the best TV I’ve ever seen. West Wing was the dream-team with whip-smart and dedicated staff and a President who had a Nobel Prize in Economics. I vaguely recall one season that was less fabulous than the others, but it still ranks a joint first. Band of Brothers was one of those programmes when the episode-hour just raced by, leaving you breathless and wanting, nay needing, the next one. I’ve happily either watched random episodes, or binged, binged, binged on both.
26. Among your friends, what are you best known for?
Snoring probably – I suffered from undiagnosed sleep apnopea for years. Since diagnosis, everyone – myself included – sleeps better. From a more positive perspective – for being a good listener and always ready to answer a call for help.
27. Who of your friends is most like you?
No-one! I remember commenting – with some surprise – on the fact that a group of such different, strong and independent women were good friends.
28. What was the most traumatizing time of your life?
When your childhood takes place against a background of civil unrest and civil war, there’s a drip-drip effect which does eventually add up. But, more recently, cancer + relationship breakdown + lack of emotional support from key people in my life = trauma, add a side order of a professional training body behaving in a dishonest and destructive manner and I think you have it. I’ve come out the other side, but it taught me to be wary, less trusting, and less willing to give of myself unless I see reciprocation. While I’ve fought against making that change to a core part of who I am, it will keep me safe from breakdown.
29. What’s the best lesson you’ve learned from a work of fiction?
When you’ve read as many self-development and professional works as I have, that’s where you find the lessons. I don’t recall reading a work of fiction and having an “aha!” moment.
30. What’s something you’ll never do again?
I spent a bit of time wondering whether to answer this from the perspective of not being able to do something again as opposed to wanting to do it again and came down on the side of the latter, mostly because the former is an inevitable part of getting older, whilst making choices remains important no matter what the age. But you know what, I couldn’t come up with anything really, nothing I haven’t already mentioned. So, there you have it – it turns out I’m game to do most anything again … the only provisos being that I’m comfortable and safe!
And so, we reach the end of the getting to know ourselves better journey. Let me know if you see any other interesting series of questions we could cover together!
Getting to know me – Part 1
Getting to know me – Part 2
Getting to know me – Part 3
© Debra Carey, 2018
debsdespatches.com 
I’ve not seen West Wing, but so many people love it that I’m going to make a point to watch it. No lessons from fiction? Interesting. I think I majored in English Lit as much as a way of learning about how people behave as a way of getting to study overseas. I did both.
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You’ve stopped me in my tracks there Ally and I had to have a serious think. I did – of course – learn a great deal through fiction, but not about myself – and that’s how I read the question. Clearly after 20 questions, I’d become so completely self-absorbed that I never considered responding with what I learned about others. It certainly contributed to my practice of people observation.
Oh & yes, do watch West Wing sometime – it might be a little hard to bear right now though.
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